IT was an emotional visit back to a place they once called home.
Ian and Nicole Hockley returned to Eastleigh at the weekend, six months after their son Dylan was gunned down by a crazed murderer at Sandy Hook Elementary School in the USA.
The six-year-old was one of 20 pupils who died and was found in the arms of one of the six teachers who also lost their lives.
The family had only just moved to the USA after Ian transferred his job at IBM in Hursley to New York.
Just days before the shooting Ian had even briefly popped back to their house in Eastleigh to finalise its sale, happily telling his neighbours of his family’s exciting new life.
Meanwhile Nicole, who is American, had left behind her corporate career in England so she could become a stay-at-home mum to help Dylan overcome his autism difficulties.
Yet this American dream became a nightmare after deranged Adam Lanza burst into the school before opening fire with mother’s Bushmaster XM15-E2S semiautomatic rifle.
Speaking to the Daily Echo at a fun day in Bishopstoke in memory of Dylan, Ian and Nicole told how help from their friends in Hampshire has helped them through their agonising loss.
Nicole said: “We can’t thank them enough for what they have done to help us through these last six months, but also today.
“It is a beautiful day and a wonderful tribute.
“There are a lot of people I have not seen for two-and-ahalf years, and it is wonderful to see them all.
“But it is quite emotional because it is the first time I have seen them since we moved.
“We draw our strength from several different places, but certainly the people around us, our friends, they are the ones that help lift us up and help us get on with each day.”
Emotional support helps, but their fight for tighter gun legislation gives them a purpose.
As previously reported, every morning Nicole kisses the urn of her son, which she keeps next to his picture, as her way of talking to him so that he would approve of the path she has taken.
A picture of Dylan in his superman suit has also been used to drive home to US lawmakers the tragedy’s human cost.
Along with other bereaved parents, the couple belong to a group called the Sandy Hook Promise, which lobbies for better mental health support and tighter firearm controls.
Nicole is at the forefront of the campaign.
She said: “I am their communications director, and our mission is to eliminate all the causes of gun violence in the US.
“It is going to take a long time.
There is a very strong gun culture in the United States, a very proud culture.
“It is a heritage, so you are never going to eliminate guns in the United States.”
Ian said: “It’s going to be a long process. It is about a slow and steady change of society, really.”
Nicole added: “We don’t talk about banning. But with rights come responsibilities, so if you are a gun owner or if you want to purchase a firearm, we just want to ensure that you are not a criminal and that you are mentally sound.”
Despite widespread revulsion at the massacre, the country’s Senate has rejected reform.
But despite this, the campaign has sympathies in a very high place.
She said: “I had the privilege to meet with President Obama on a number of occasions and what always strikes me when I meet him, when he is talking to us and any of the other families, is that this has touched him on a very personal level.
“He’s not just acting as the President of the United States or as a Democrat, he is just acting as a person and as a daddy. He can imagine and understand what it is like to lose a child.
“He loves his children really dearly and he does not want this to happen to anyone else.
“So his actions and the things that he says to us are all about ‘don’t give
up, keep doing what you are doing’. He believes it, and I believe it too.
“We will be going back to Washington DC in July and supporting
legislation and hoping it comes back to a vote in July or in September
after the August recess.”
Youngsters play in sumo suits during a Day for Dylan
The couple’s cause has supporters throughout the world, including their
old friends in Eastleigh Lin Trott, close friend from Bishopstoke and organiser of Saturday’s Day for Dylan, said: “I can’t imagine what they are going through.
“So to be able to turn that into positive change through the Sandy Hook
Promise, not only for gun control but for mental health issues in America,
is just amazing.”
The event was raising money for Hampshire Autistic Society.
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