A CRIBBAGE player who goes by the glorious name of Eugene McWilliams pulled me to one side during the finals night at Swaythling WMC on Thursday evening to tell me a sad tale – or so I thought.

Moments after his Bitterne Park WMC side beat Shirley Social B in the Malcolm Brooke Plate, Eugene tugged my arm.

“One of our players died yesterday,” he told me solemnly.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I replied, already thinking of the headline: CRIBBAGE CHAMPIONS DEDICATE WIN TO DEAD TEAMMATE.

“Yes,” added Eugene. “He drowned.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I replied, now thinking tabloid style: CRIBBAGE STAR PEGS OUT FOR LAST TIME or even WAT-ER WAY TO PEG OUT.

And with a perfectly straight face Eugene delivered the punchline: “He fell into a bowl of muesli and a strong currant pulled him under.”