How do we get through this?

ON the white wood of the front porch someone has written in red marker "Gossey RIP'. Inside, amid the ornaments and family photos, condolence cards line the shelves.

One reads: 'There are no words to express how I feel'.

It is just over a week since 15-year-old Jamie Gosney died after the moped he and his friend Lewis Grundy, 17, were riding was in collision with a car.

Jamie's parents, Terry and Debbie look desperately tired.

"You don't expect to outlive your children," murmured Debbie, her voice cracking with emotion.

"How am I going to get through this?"

Terry put an arm around his wife's slight figure and pulled her close to his chest. Her shoulders heaved as she sobbed. The pain is etched on Terry's face.

Up until that fateful day on Friday January 21, Jamie had been an outgoing teenager with a heart of gold. He excelled at athletics and was a keen fisherman.

But, his parents say, by not wearing a crash helmet, the youngster's life has been tragically cut short.

"The amount of times I told him a wear a helmet," said 40-year-old Terry as he shakes his head sadly.

"He had three helmets here but kids think it isn't cool to wear one.

"It was only six months ago that he came off a bike and whacked his head. He had to keep going to the hospital for two months afterwards because they thought he had a perforated eardrum.

"It put him off even getting on a bike for quite a while.

"I had told him when he had the accident: 'You only have one life son'. But I thought to myself then that this lad is going to end up killing himself on these bikes.

"I think this was the first or second time he had been on a bike since then.

"Hopefully this will make youngsters think twice about going on mopeds without helmets."

Debbie added: "The only bit of comfort I have is knowing that he died instantly and didn't suffer."

Jamie excelled at most things that he turned his hand to. In November 2003 he took part in a weeklong course with the Army arranged through Millbrook Community School.

"Out of the 30 pupils who went on it he was the best pupil that week," said Debbie, 39.

"They said that if he ever decided to join the Army he would get a place.

"But he wanted to become a welder. He used to dote on my dad who was a boilermaker at Fawley. Jamie wanted to end up there too.

"He had got halfway through a two-day-a-week welding course at Southampton City College, but he had broken his wrist falling over so had to give it up.

"He had been top of the class. He was due to restart the course in September. It's five years since my dad died and now Jamie has gone too."

The Gosney family had been hoping for a good year. Jamie was about to celebrate his 16th birthday, it was Debbie's 40th and their 20th wedding anniversary.

Now all they have are memories of their precious first-born son.

"He was very outgoing and couldn't sit still for five minutes," said Terry, a painter at Southampton docks.

"One of his report cards from school said that he could even become a professional athlete. He had so much going for him.

"He was saving for a motorbike by doing odd jobs indoors, washing the car and cutting the grass for his Nan.

"He had put a deposit down and we were going to pay for lessons for him.

"All his posters of motorbikes are still on his bedroom wall and his dartboard that he had for Christmas is still on the floor waiting to be put up."

"Friday was the first night Jamie had been out that week as he'd had flu," recalled Debbie.

"He was going out to see a few mates. A couple of hours later he came back in because he had slipped up.

"He wanted to change his tracksuit because it was dirty. He was so vain, he would change his clothes three times a day.

"I remember him saying to me before he went out: 'Mum get into bed you aren't well' as I had the flu too.

"That was the last thing he ever said to me."

At 1.45am Debbie and Terry were woken by two local girls knocking at the door of their terraced house in Buttermere Close, Millbrook.

"They said that they had heard Jamie had been in a motorbike accident and was at the hospital," sighed Debbie.

"Terry phoned the hospital but they said that they had no one there of that name."

"Unknown to us he was still at the roadside," said Terry.

"We just assumed that the girls were wrong as they were a bit drunk, so we just went back to bed."

At 4am there was another knock at the door. Debbie looked out the window and saw it was the police. She knew instantly that the girls had been right.

"Terry stayed at home with our other children," said Debbie.

"I went to identify Jamie. When I saw his body, all I could smell was his Joop aftershave. It was his favourite."

Jamie's brother Thomas, eight, and sister Gemma, 14, are finding it hard to come to terms with his death.

"Friday was the first night that Thomas managed to sleep in the room which he shared with Jamie," said Terry.

"It is only just sinking in for him. He said: 'My brother used to take care of me. If anyone used to say anything about me he was there.'

"He idolised Jamie."

On Friday a service of remembrance was held at Millbrook Community School.

"Gemma stood up and read a poem that she and her friend wrote about Jamie," said Debbie.

Called Goodbye my brother the first verse reads: My brother Jamie, an awesome guy, I don't know why you had to die. You were so cute as a little boy, you smiled at us and brought us joy.

"It's been her way of coping," said Terry.

Jamie's funeral is to be held tomorrow at St Peter's Church, Maybush at 11.30am. His burial will follow at Hollybrook Cemetery at 12.30pm

"Jamie is going to be buried in his new white tracksuit and Timberland shoes," Debbie said. "He will be wearing a baseball cap too. He would always wear one if his hair wasn't right.

"We are going to play Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton and Curtain Falls by Blue. His friends say he loved that song.

"In the coffin we will be putting a red rose with a teddy with 'I love you' written on it and a fishing manual.

"He loved fishing and was in the Angling Times on his tenth birthday because of a fish he caught.

"We'll also put in his Tim Westwood CD and a bottle of Joop.

"We don't know how we are going to cope without Jamie. If he had only worn a crash helmet things may have turned out so differently."