Motor neurone disease is a rapidly progressive and fatal disease that can affect any adult at any time. Hampshire couple David and Jill Fox talked to Sarah Cole about living with an incurable disease...

AFTER years of playing golf, Dave Fox was baffled why his game was suddenly slipping. He tried professional tuition but there was no improvement.

Things turned worse when he began tripping over backwards for no apparent reason.

As the falls on the golf course became increasingly frequent, bouts of knee pain also developed, and he eventually sought medical advice.

It was only in June 2001, after being referred to a neurologist, that he was finally diagnosed with Primary Lateral Sclerosis (PLS) - a form of motor neurone disease.

Although unfamiliar with PLS, Dave and wife Jill knew enough about motor neurone disease to know it was serious.

Jill, 63, of Southampton, said: "I had heard of motor neurone disease but only because of the film star David Niven.

"Everyone knows about cancer and Aids but no one seems to know much about MND."

Jill said: "I tried to find out as much information as I could but we weren't daft. We knew that something foul was happening, and the diagnosis just confirmed our fears, really.

"With this disease, some people are dead within six or seven months, while others go on for years."

The couple decided to sell their house and move to a bungalow to provide wheelchair access for Dave, now 67.

But just as they were about to exchange contracts, both admitted they didn't really want to move.

Instead they resolved to continue doing as much as Dave's devastating illness allowed.

Jill packed in her job, sold her car and devoted her full-time attention to her husband.

The couple went out as much as possible - with trips to the Isle of Wight, Kent, Devon and Cornwall, where Dave used to work as a yacht harbour manager at Falmouth.

But, as the months went on, Dave's condition inevitably deteriorated and they could no longer just take off in the car.

Currently, Dave is unable to drive until their car has undergone further adjustments.

Instead, his days are spent reading books and working on his computer, which he uses to e-mail another PLS patient in Dorset.

With his speech now becoming increasingly difficult, Dave has also just taken delivery of a hi-tech lightwrighter machine, which will "speak" words he types into it.

For Dave and Jill, their lives must adapt to every next stage of the incurable disease, which progressively attacks the cells sending messages from the brain to the muscles.

MND destroys the ability to walk, talk, dress and swallow - but leaves the intellect and senses unaffected.

Just getting Dave up, showered and dressed takes about two hours every morning.

Despite everything, the couple have maintained their sense of humour.

Dave, once a keen whisky drinker, smiles as he recalls how Jill would put thickener in his favourite tipple to help it go down.

Jill has got to know how even the tips of broccoli florets or the seeds in a slice of kiwi fruit are enough to send her husband into a coughing fit.

When that happens, she reaches for a jar of honey and feeds Dave a teaspoonful to ease his throat."We get through jars of the stuff," she laughs.

The couple, who have three grown-up children from previous relationships, joke about how Dave once slid to the bottom of a specialist tilting bed, and how his motorised scooter has damaged all the skirting boards and doors.

It is their way of coping.

"We have got to think about what we have done, not what we haven't," said Jill.

"There is always someone worse off than you. We are never going to give up - we will always go out and do as much as we can."

Clearly devoted to each other, Jill and Dave, who have been together for 24 years, have also received support from the Motor Neurone Disease Association's Southampton branch.

They are also full of praise for social services, which provides wheelchair ramps, bars and handles to meet Dave's changing needs, as well as the staff at Southampton General Hospital's neurology department.

"I have nothing but praise for the hospital, from the doctors through to the speech therapists and the physiotherapists," said Jill. "They are gods as far as I am concerned."

HOW WE CAN HELP:

CURRENTLY there are 19 people in the Southampton area living with motor neurone disease.

The MND Association's Southampton and district branch provides vital support for people suffering from what it describes as a "horrible, devastating and relentless" disease.

Chairman Pamela Jupe, a retired nurse who also served as the branch's secretary for eight years, said: "We are a happy, vibrant and thriving organisation.

"Obviously we wish we weren't necessary, but we are. It is like one big family. There is a lot of tears, hugs and shared comfort."

The branch's dedicated band of volunteers organise regular coffee mornings, outings, fundraising events and street collections, as well as helping to provide vital equipment and grants for local MND patients.

At the moment, the Southampton and district branch is in urgent need of a new secretary.

For more information, call Pamela Jupe on 01489 602844.