Martial arts expert and local author Alan Gibson has a new topic for his latest tome. He tells KATE THOMPSON how the birth of his daughter Tabitha has inspired him...
WAITING for the birth of his daughter Tabitha, Southampton author Alan Gibson became aware of a gap in the market. While there are quite literally hundreds of books about pregnancy and birth written by women for mums-to-be, there is very little available for expectant dads to digest.
"I discovered there was very little available for men to read about the whole process of fatherhood - so I decided to put my own book together with contributions by men aimed at a male audience," said Alan, 40.
A doting dad, he admitted Tabitha's arrival had quite literally changed the lives of himself and his psychologist partner Sarah.
"'An everyday miracle' is the clich they use to describe childbirth and it is true.
"Literally everything changes but it's fantastic. Even when it is incredibly frustrating, I will catch sight of Tabitha and she will give me one of her giggles - and suddenly everything is OK," he said.
Nowadays men are far more involved with their children and no longer simply see themselves as the breadwinner who leaves the mother to deal with the kids.
Alan has so far written three popular books on Wing Chun, the style of Chinese kung fu studied by Bruce Lee and published Saints in Stripes, a history of the kits worn by Southampton Football Club.
When he started his writing career, Alan could not interest a publisher so decided to do it himself - and when that was a success.
He suddenly had publishers calling him.
"I decided to write the book on Wing Chun because there was nothing much available on the subject.
"My teachers at school would laugh because my two worst subjects were English and sport - and now I write about sport.
"Any worries I may have had were overcome because I am so interested in the subject and I wanted to produce a book that would convey that enthusiasm.
"Initially no one wanted to publish me so I financed it myself but once it sold well in places like Waterstones, suddenly they all wanted to know. But in the end I chose to go with a distributor," he said.
The book aims to give useful and often humorous advice to dads-to-be and men preparing to start a family, and will also focus on the emotional aspects of men, a subject that Alan feels is all too often completely ignored.
"People talk about men feeling jealous when a baby comes along but I don't think that is true.
"Rather I think men really want to be involved in every aspect of bringing up their children and sometimes they can feel excluded," he said.
Alan is now looking for contributions from other men who may have some interesting anecdotes and top tips for future fathers.
He wants to hear from anyone who is prepared to write about how it felt when their partner conceived, what her pregnancy was like for him, how the birth was, if they were present and what the sleepless nights of early fatherhood was like.
If you would like to contribute your thoughts contact Alan by e-mail alan@wingchun.org.uk or by post to: Alan Gibson, 352 Priory Rd, St Denys, Southampton, SO17 2LQ
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