Buying a car can be a minefield even for those who know the difference between the windscreen wash and battery fluid so imagine how it can be for a lone female with the only criterion being the colour! Ali Kefford reports...

MY elderly Peugeot 205 looked at me. I looked at my Peugeot 205. It was time we had a full and open chat about the future of our relationship.

"Look," I began tentatively, looking him fairly and squarely straight between the headlights.

"I'm not sure you're going to make it through the winter.

"You've been looking a bit under the weather recently and seem to have a rather bad cough.

"I know you've been brilliant all these years but . . ."

And then I kind of ran out of puff.

You see it was true.

Battered Peugeot 205, with his bizarre gearbox and innovative approach to cornering, had been a trusty friend.

Together we had sat immobile in roadworks on the M27 for hours on end, dodged tractors in narrow country lanes and fought for parking spaces at supermarkets.

He'd never broken down, never failed to start.

But then he'd never really overtaken anything speedier than an ambling toddler either.

For him the fast lane was a rarely visited place where cars with five gears hung out.

Now, in the past couple of days, he seemed to have developed some sort of new throaty roar and goodness only knows what that meant.

Yet I still felt extremely disloyal about contemplating binning him.

Predictably, following our little talk, battered grey Peugeot 205 went off in a bit of a sulk.

He rattled even more than usual and women's editor Kate Thompson said he sounded like a lawnmower.

So the decision was made and the quest to find his successor began.

This proved a baffling process for someone who still thinks a pair of tights can double as a fan belt.

And intimidating too, bearing in mind that a recent report found that female drivers are routinely ripped off by garages.

The salesmen certainly appeared to rumble the fact that I'd never once strayed under a bonnet in a matter of seconds.

"Lovely car that," they'd purr as I peered through the window of each vehicle.

"Do you wanna take her for a test drive then mate?"

"Mate?" "MATE???!!!!" I think not.

Granite hard in character, some of these salesmen had a saccharine charm that left you feeling vaguely queasy.

Others barked brusquely, which made you wonder if they were perhaps trying to intimidate you (which they almost undoubtedly were).

Several moaned that their profession had a bad reputation which it just didn't deserve.

One even wanted a deposit on a car I hadn't seen and wouldn't see for several weeks. I mean, what on earth was that all about?

Underneath my bristling exterior half of me felt deeply indignant, while the other half felt like a lamb to the slaughter.

Luckily my bleating in the office paid off and I discovered the Daily Echo photographic department includes several men who know exactly what they're talking about when it comes to motors.

I know, I know it's a real clich to be the ditsy female whose eyes widen sharply when someone utters the word "engine" but I'm not alone and garages are hardly brimming with employees drawn from the fairer sex.

The only female mechanic I can think of is Kylie Minogue's Neighbours' character Charlene.

While she certainly seemed to enjoy rummaging under cars and getting greasy it was only a passing phase.

Nowadays you wouldn't find Kylie within a quarter of a mile of a rusty exhaust pipe.

True she helped launch the new Ford StreetKa at the Paris Motor Show last month but, apart from this, it's probably limos all the way in between stints of sending millions of men cross-eyed as she tells them she can't get them out of her mind.

For my part I somehow gained O-level Physics but have since clung to the view that things mechanical are best left alone (unless you're talking about Royal Navy missile systems which are, of course, deeply fascinating).

So the search for my next chariot continued for several weeks.

It all seemed both time-consuming and fruitless.

Yes I'm clueless about cars but being treated like I was a rinse short of a car wash was beginning to grate.

Yet, we were running out of time.

Battered grey J-reg Peugeot 205's MoT was due to expire in a matter of days and I knew getting him through the test would be a traumatic experience for everyone involved and especially for my bank account.

Then, out of the blue one morning, I spotted him.

Big, black and sporty, his picture was nestled at the bottom of one of the Daily Echo's car ad pages.

Within seconds I'd dialled the contact number.

Within the hour we were there, admiring his sleek lines and gleaming body work, prodding the stereo and waggling the gearstick.

As Kylie would say, it was love at first sight.

Having watched all these shenanigans from across the road battered grey J-reg Peugeot 205, threw his toys out of the pram.

He lurched back to the office, spluttered into the nearest parking space and would have backfired if he knew how.

Despite this vehicular tantrum the deal was soon done.

There was some signing on the dotted line, cashwaving, scrabbling around for MoT certificates and the rattling of car keys.

The man I bought it off didn't do the hard sell which is probably why I bought black Astra.

I then crept off down The Avenue, making a grinding acquaintance with the clutch and gears, trying to block out the memory of Peugeot 205 sitting unwanted in a cul-de-sac.

Then onto the motorway where I darted straight into my usual place tucked in on the left.

It wasn't until 15 minutes later that the light dawned that I really didn't need to be here anymore and there were two whole new lanes on the motorway to discover.

Since then it's been up, up and away though several passengers have complained of white-knuckle rides. However you'll be relieved to know I haven't given black Astra a name.

Now that would be just way too girlie.

TIPS FOR CAR BUYERS:

WHAT CAR? magazine says its facilities are referred to by more used-car buyers than any other title in the UK - so it knows all the dos and don'ts of checking out a potential purchase.

The tips it gives include:

Do a test drive of at least 20 minutes, checking for steering play, suspension clonks, mechanical noise and pulling brakes.

Research car values on What Car? online and by touring local dealers. Check your chosen car's age, mileage and condition.

Warranties get a bad reputation when people who sell them fail to explain they are only insurance policies. Check for exclusions such as wear and tear and poor maintenance.

Don't be rushed by the seller.

Give any prospective car an inch-by-inch examination, checking the panel gaps for consistency, inner body walls for buckling, tyres for uneven wear and the engine for noise and smoke.

If you don't know what you're doing use an inspection company.

Ensure the logbook bears the seller's name and address.

Examine the service history, cross-check mileages with garages and old MoTs.

Stay cool when haggling and never be pressured into closing a deal.

The seller needs you more than you need him. Know your prices and the market and go in low, but pitch your bid sensibly to keep the seller interested.