The Complete Guide To Gatecrashing by Nicholas Allan is published by Ebury Press, priced £4.99 and is available now...
Sitting all alone at home with no parties to go to? Well, don't despair because now you can learn how to freeload your way to a more glamorous life.
Free food, quality bubbly or simply hob-nobbing with the stars is a surefire way to give your social life the kick it needs this Christmas - and it's an art that can be taught.
According to Nicholas Allan, gatecrasher extraordinaire and author of The Complete Guide To Gatecrashing, the freeloader is a figure of wonder. The gatecrasher looks enigmatic, seductive and charismatic.
"Gatecrashing is a skill which eventually becomes an art because you have to learn to rely on your intuition," Allan explains. "I've been gatecrashing for three years and in that time, you learn to become more adept at interpreting different situations.
"The best parties that I've gatecrashed have been the ones that I know nothing about - for example, where you're passing a party in a hotel. You then have to work quickly and think of a way to get in without being noticed."
So how does a best-selling author turn into a gatecrashing junkie?
"Gatecrashing can become an addiction - the need to gatecrash overrides any consideration for others. Deceit becomes, not only natural, but preferable.
"One of the effects of prolonged gatecrashing is a gradual defocusing and eventual decay of moral judgment. You have little qualms with lying and bluffing people. Although you will make many friends, they are only party friends and you only know them through
deception."
Allan offers some tips for the novice gatecrasher. "Generally speaking, it's easier for women to gatecrash than for men. Women tend to be more desirable for the party and they are usually glamorously dressed. As long as they are good-looking, they will normally be admitted without many questions.
It's not important if you get found out - the most the
bouncers or security guards can do is to escort you outside. If you are unsuccessful the first time, just try again. It takes time and practice to perfect the skill of gatecrashing."
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