JUST THINK, those poor old alchemists spent fruitless years trying to turn base metal in gold, and along comes Steve Claridge and with his first touch . . .
Pompey's new player-manager probably won't be donning a pointy hat with stars on it, or popping off his application to the magic circle despite a magical afternoon.
Claridge's Midas touch saw his new charges conjure up their first win in six and he topped it off with what proved to be the winning goal.
It was no fluke, although the football gods are probably smiling down on Cleggy somewhere by providing him with Sheffield Wednesday as his first opponents.
Someone with a perverse sense of humour at Hillsborough signed a sponsorship deal with Chupa Chups as everyone gets to lick Sheffield Wednesday at the moment.
The difference between the two sides' body language was apparent the moment they took the field. Pompey were pumped and fired, no doubt stirred by a team talk from a manager who has blue blood coursing through his veins. Wednesday are down in the dumps more than Steptoe & Son.
Pompey definitely held the morale high-ground. Sending Marc Keller back to West Ham, recalling Scott Hiley to the starting line-up and Mike Panopoulos to the bench were psychological smarts. It sent out a message of Cosa Nostra collectiveness, Our Own Thing, Ourselves. And of course it got the required response.
The differences between the same players who went out under Tony Pulis and those who played under Claridge were spiritual more than physical.
Defenders like Hiley were encouraged to pass the ball to another blue shirt instead of playing the ball into space. There appeared to be more fluency in midfield, especially from Thomas Thogersen.
Under Claridge, the Dane might well be given licence to do what is almost lost in the mists of time and what he originally came as. Having played at right-back, wing-back and midfield anchor, Thogersen relished the freedom given him. He is technically sound and a good passer of the ball, with an excellent short game perfectly suited to the sort of role where he would provide the link to the front men.
His opening goal typified that, as he killed Claridge's knock down, invited and neatly side-stepped a couple of rash challenges and passed the ball into the left-hand corner.
The goal triggered what would have been a psychoanalyst's field day. Pompey drew collective strength and confidence from it, Wednesday descended into fractious squabbling, blame-placing and responsibility-avoidance that would have done justice to Lord of the Flies, apart from the fact they had no leader.
Pompey did have a leader, and he set the example three minutes into the second-half when he showed the sharpest reactions to nip in front of Kevin Pressman as Wednesday sulked at a corner and allowed Darren Moore and Linvoy Primus to win uncontested headers.
But at the risk of pouring cold water on the fireworks instead of gasoline, Claridge will not be fooled.
Out of left field, Wednesday found a goal they previously didn't look capable of producing as Owen Morrison was allowed to drift in from the left touchline to curl a shot round the otherwise unemployed Hoult.
Now it was Wednesday who found confidence, and asked questions of Pompey in a final 20 minutes that was more nervous than it should have been.
But better sides than the hapless Sheffield Wednesday will set harder questions and that's when Claridge will discover that he still has the same set of players who got Pompey into their early season funk.
That's when he'll really find out about his players and whether the powerful fuel of belief and passion can keep them flying.
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