In a desperate situation, scared and frightened, I went into Bourne Road 14 months ago for a detox and after care. I was very withdrawn and isolated after 12 months of living inside four walls with nothing but alcohol and the telly for company.
I was in a bad way. I didn't know what to expect, as I didn't know what was going to happen to me, and where I was going with my life.
I found it hard to trust people, too.
I didn't have what most people think of as a childhood.
I suffered physical and mental abuse from as early as I can remember.
My mother was schizophrenic. Whatever problems the schizophrenia caused were doubled by my mum's severe alcohol abuse. Others in my life also abused me and it was all alcohol-fuelled.
My own drinking began to get out of control in my mid-20s.
I was like an open sore from all the abuse that I had suffered.
My mind was full of thoughts whirling round so, at night time, I'd blot that out with drink.
I had managed to pull myself together but when my children left home it tipped me over the edge.
Alcohol had always been a crutch for me and I turned back to it when I was in trouble.
I was in counselling to help me deal with my abuse and my counsellor and now a good friend helped get me into detox.
I met the detox workers and started my detox.
I didn't know what was going on much in the first week as I couldn't even remember my keyworker meeting me on first day. It took me a week to remember her.
I remember staying in my bedroom for about four days, just sleeping most of the time because of the detox medication.
As I had been isolated for 12 months, I found it hard interacting with people at first, but as I became more sober more I began to laugh again and have good conversations.
My confidence grew every day and I looked forward to getting up in the mornings all bright and sparky and looking good again.
Then I began to go into the lounge where I saw computers.
I had always had a phobia about computers, probably because I'd never used one and was embarrassed to tell people but, funnily enough, I'm now writing this article on a lap top. I so needed to be around good, safe, trusting people who cared about me, and I got that at Bourne Road they were non- judgemental, which is incredibly important, too.
The care and support I received was excellent and it put faith back in me that there are good people in this world, as I had suffered years of abuse and was around the wrong people for most of my life.
If you have never had a crisis in your life, and have never had to use alcohol as a crutch or anything else for that matter you would probably be wondering how a place like Bourne Road works.
Let me tell you.
When people go off the rails and are in a crisis for whatever reason, be it bereavement, or abuse, or some sort or trauma like depression the list is endless Bourne Road is there to help you out of that crisis in the most caring kind manner.
You get a keyworker who does one-to-ones with you, and they go through a management care plan with you to sort out any debt, housing issues, GP, dentist, counselling, and anything else that needs sorting out that might be added worries.
People might think that whoever goes into detox and aftercare are not nice, and are society's rejects. But that's not the case at all.
One of the guys that I met owned his own house, had a good business, wife the lot and was in the same boat as me.
He was under a lot of pressure in his life and the alcohol became his crutch.
I've known very rich people who get to crisis point, so it doesn't matter what kind of background you are from because in a lot of people's lives a crisis will come along and people don't all deal with the crisis in a textbook way.
I wonder if the public realise the detox unit is not just for homeless people.
It is a community resource.
Only a quarter of those who use it, if that, are actually homeless.
The rest are a cross-section of society parents, doctors, shop workers everyone.
l Carol Bibby, 40, lives in Bitterne Park. She is at studying for a City and Guilds qualification in mental health.
She also does voluntary work for Southampton Voluntary Service.
She was checked into Bourne Road on April 7, 2005, and has not returned to her alcohol problem since.
She is a mother of two grown-up children. She has previously worked as a security guard and in youth and community work.
She is in the process of setting up a self-support and social group for people with alcohol issues.
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article