WHEN you are little, cartoons are the best thing in the world. I remember as a toddler being appalled when my programming was interrupted by sport, sitcoms or heaven forbid, news.

As I got older and my heart hardened against this kind of innocent fun they gradually disappeared from my life.

In my 20s I certainly wasn’t going to get up with a hangover on Saturdays to see Bugs Bunny tease Elmer Fudd.

However, in recent years they have made a comeback.

My film collection is now littered with Disney and Pixar classics from The Fox and Hound and The Sorcerer’s Apprentice to WALL-E and Up. Box sets of The Simpsons, Futurama and Family Guy also feature heavily.

I didn’t think much about this until I met up with a friend who had just returned from China with a suitcase and a smug expression.

“You will never guess what I’ve got,” he said with childlike glee in his voice.

He rejected every crime-themed guess with growing excitement before revealing his find – the complete Mickey Mouse collection – hundreds of hours of fun based on the activities of the celebrity rodent.

There is always the risk when you watch programmes from your youth that they will not live up to your childhood memories.

I have also noticed a troubling trend where cartoon makers sexualise some of their stars – not just the Betty Boops and Jessica Rabbits, but less obvious characters.

This can be confusing and I was roundly blasted when I referred to Nala as “the fit one from The Lion King” and later compared an ex-girlfriend to Geppetto’s slutty lip-stickwearing goldfish from Pinocchio.

A while ago I was going out with a stunning mum-of-two and sat down with her and the kids to watch some afternoon cartoons.

I was appalled to see offerings such as Skunk Fu, Ben 10: Ultimate Alien, and Generator Rex – where were the classics like Inspector Gadget and Duck Tales?

Even He-Man had suffered a troubling makeover with the hulking, muscle-bound hero being replaced with a slimmed-down pansy.

I talked about his transformation with the kids, but that night, as my girlfriend got into bed, she asked me coldly: “Why did you tell my children the original He-Man had to be replaced after testing positive for steroids?”

I was relieved I had not found the opportunity to test out my hilarious gag about the Little Mermaid getting tangled up in tuna nets.

To win her back, I introduced her to the greatest cartoon of my generation – Dogtanian.

As I watched the fantastic adventures of the swashbuckling pup I wondered if it was wrong to envy the life of a cartoon dog.

That night I whispered my plans for the future to the object of my affections.

I think she may have been sleepy as her only argument was: “Don’t be silly, you are far too old to retrain as a Muskehound.”